Oh, potato, if you only knew,
I'm three years younger than you.
Oh, potato, if only you knew,
Boiled potato.

I had a hole in my heart
And you landed on my plate.
Now, I feel all weak in the knees.
Was it something I ate?

Oh, potato, if you only knew,
I don't know what to do.
Oh, potato, if you only knew,
What I think of you.

You make me hate myself.
You make me feel like a bubbling fool.
I'm stupid and ugly.
You're superior and cool.

Oh, potato, if you only knew,
How many times I think of you.
Oh, potato, if you only knew,
What I think of you.

I'm glad I met ya',
My boiled potato.
I wanna' show you to the world,
To everyone I know.

Oh, potato, if you only knew,
Whenever I think, I think of you.
Oh, potato, if you only knew,
What I think of you.

(Anywhere you be)
(Be alone with me)

Oh, potato, if you only knew,
I don't know what to do.
Oh, potato, if you only knew,
What I think of you.