I. DRANK MYSELF TO DEATH We got a bottle of Jim Beam and I drank a liter. To distract me from my constant overthinking I need a breather.
You built this up your head. The pressure. Relax, don't think too much 'cause you can't take this. Well, I relaxed with liquor. The pressure has gone away, but baby, I can't see shit. It's not the same to me when falling on my face. I finally drank myself to death.
Enter the shaking, maaan, I shoulda eaten something. Enter the crying. "My life is useless and I won't amount to nothing." Better start dying.
You built this up your head. The pressure. Relax, don't think too much 'cause you can't take this. Well, I relaxed with liquor. The pressure has gone away, but baby, I can't see shit. It's not the same to me when falling on my face. Wrap me up in sheets, there's nothing left to see her.
I should be old enough to know (better better) and I SHOULD be young enough to not take everything so seriously SHOULD be smart enough to know that doing this is dangerous this mixing anxious energy with drunk ferocious carelessness. I finally drank myself to death.
It's turned to laughs. I'm turning red outside on Cedar St. It's twenty-two degrees. I'm screaming "M-I-N-N-E-A-P-O-L-I-S CAN KISS MY ASS IN HELL" I've built you up in my head and now you've started a war in my head.
II. TRUE 'TIL COLLEGE Get me a friend or a smoke or a hospital or a suicide pill. Get me a million dollar record deal so I can end this charade. I've been writing the same song over again, over again, over again. Over and over and over and over again.
And it feels like heroin. I just got addicted to demanding your attention for my trite repetition. And I can't stop thinking about the first songs I ever wrote Where I swore off alcohol 'cause I knew better. And I can't stop feeling like that "straight edge" shit became a cult But I'm kidding myself by believing that the bar scene is any better.
And I keep writing the same damn song over again and over again and over again. And it feels like there's nothing left at all.