Its christmas we're talkin' ‘bout!
(short pause)
No! beware!
Ill cover you in fast eddies underwear
Wow ill eat your mammies panties
And tell your mom to come to me
And come to my prom
Its in outer space
That's where my sleigh can fly to
Goodbye! excuse you
Can i come back and say the rest of it?
Its christmas kids and you're gonna love it!
Gravy dripping all over me
Christmas is good...
But only when i come to your house
And you've been good
Christmas comes to everyone in every neighborhood
Whoa yeah
Christmas in fact
You see christmas layin' on its back....
Get back to work bitch!
With me on top
And don't you ever ever pull the lever that says stop

Jimmy pop: santa cooked your christmas in his hobbit hole
Bam: but why's it so cold?
X4
----------------------------------------------------
Yeah you know....
It is what it is so...
Whoa!
I took a big ol' dump in a pringles can..
Now i'm wipin' off my ass
Forget about my hand
Pumped up ready to do it
I get in my sled
My sack filled with fluid
Im bringin joy to my elves..
Don't put it by me
Pleasures i wont deny their heiney
My armpits will sweat when i see that long-haired elf
Coming out of his corvette
Even though its old
And its got a little scratch
It don't matter
I just love to lick his patch..
On his chest
You'll catch me red-handed
Douglas! i'm the christmas bandit!
Top-soil plant
Don't you love the taste
Of a beaver when it hesitates
---------------(chorus)---------------------------
With this christmas you're going dutch
Bam: but whys it so cold
Get me outta this now!
Bam: but whys it so cold
Let me...rub your back
Bam: but why's it so cold
You're gonna make a lot of money kid!
Bam: but why's it so cold?
I'll invest every bit of love i got!
Bam: but why's it so cold?
I got a toolbox!
Bam: but why's it so cold?
It makes no sense!
Bam: but why's it so cold?
Fill you up...
With pleasurous nutrients
Like a worm has!
---------(chorus)---------------
Weiner...ho ho ho
Bam: but why's it so cold?
X5
Bam: and it all happened at the company christmas party?
*snorts* oh yeah!