Chris Cohen
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Going Green Is Killing Me

Chris Cohen


They say the World will finish soon
All the aerosols and CO2
Are burning through the ozone layer
And raising sea levels everywhere
So I decided I would take a stand
Change my life make a plan
Try to save the Earth, bit by bit,
But I cant say it was worth it

Bought a Prius for my girlfriend,
Electrics good for the environment,
But its quiet and I didnt hear her,
As that sodding car got nearer
I broke my spine in seven places
Lost a kidney and smashed my face in
I did my bit for global warming
Lets hope my spine will start reforming

Going green is killing me,
I thought these changes were easy
If sea levels rise, with pollution mounting
Ill buy a boat I can float about in
Going green is killing me,
I thought these changes were easy
Ill take my chances with acid rain
If it means I can avoid this pain.

I wanted to make the future bright
So I turned my fridge off every night
Yes my energy outputs low
But I also contracted Polio
I now have a fever and stomach pains
Constipation and severe migraines
But hey the polar bears are fine
It was worth it all I think youll find

Going green is killing me,
I thought these changes were easy
If sea levels rise, with pollution mounting
Ill buy a boat I can float about in
Going green is killing me,
I thought these changes were easy
Ill take my chances with acid rain
If it means I can avoid this pain.
My aunt did her bit for the next generation
By not refilling at that petrol station
Her car broke down on a dark country lane
And she was never seen again

Used no antiperspirant for a month
Cos Aerosols cause the planet harm
My girlfriend left, lived with her mum
I smelled like a dead cat left in the sun
I decided to bank online,
Save trips to the bank, paper and time,
Account got hacked, next thing I knew,
Id transferred all my cash to some bloke called Stu

Going green is killing me,
I thought these changes were easy
If sea levels rise, with pollution mounting
Ill buy a boat I can float about in
Going green is killing me,
I thought these changes were easy
In 100 years. Well mae a better day
Sod that I wont be here anyway

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