We got owners, favorite drivers,
Boy, that Tony Stewart's a whiner.
And we got rookies, advertisers,
Like uhhh let's say: Havoline, Target,
Sharpie, Caterpillar, Nextel,
Mountain Dew, Dupont, Lowe's, Home Depot
Kodak, M&Ms, Ups, Tide, Alltel, Gillette
Kelloggs, Viagra, Dewalt, and uhhh Budweiser.
But the trophy girls still have my favorite parts.
Vroom, vroom, vroom, vroom, vroom, I love Nascar.

We got cautions, we got pitstops,
You can't hear a dang thing once the flag drops.
And poor Kyle Petty, an' Swervin' Marlin, ha ha,
Are gonna find it tough to beat Mark Martin.
'Cause that Viagra car is always driven hard.
Vroom, vroom, vroom, vroom, vroom, I love Nascar.

I love Nascar, it's my kind of race.
Just watchin' Jeff Gordon plow up a wall
Puts a smile on Dale Junior's face.
No caviar, it's beer and Mopar.
Vroom, vroom, vroom, vroom, vroom, I love Nascar.

I like short tracks, you'll see more wrecks,
And about a million screamin' rednecks.
And ol' Jeff Burton, ha, an' poor Mike Skinner,
Well, they've done forgot what it's like to be a winner.
And Ken Schrader still ain't sure
who his sponsors are.
Vroom, vroom, vroom, vroom, vroom, I love Nascar.

"Hey, that was a close one up there fellas
I about got into one there.
I might pull over right up here next pitstop
I want you to get two right front tires.
I need a wedge on the left side
get this windsheild cleaned, get on the gas.
And if you don't care, hand me a pair of underwear
I have messed all in my drawers."

I like football. (I like football.)
I like my wrestlin'.
I like a good game of air hockey,
I like some ping-pong now an' then.
How about you, Toby?

(Toby)
I love Nascar, it's my kind of race.
Just to see Big E back on the track,
Would put a smile on every face.
No one drove a car quite like Earnhardt.
Vroom, vroom, vroom, vroom, vroom, I love Nascar.

(Both)
Vroom, vroom, vroom

(Toby)
Gentlemen, start your engines

(Both)
I love Nascar.