A man came into our town
Swinging his partner around
He grabbed his young maid by the wrist
And bent down to give her a
Paper to sign right away
Saying they're parting their ways
She grabbed her man by his side and stared right deep in his
Wallet to get her fair share
But when she got her hands in there
The wallet was empty of course
So she said that you can't have your
Distance makes the heart grow fonder
if you ain't fond go wait a little farther
When you return be sure to ring my bell
Because you got lots of my things that I need to get
So if you get back and I ain't home yet
I'll leave a note tellin' you to go to Helen's Restaurant
So when that young woman got home
She couldn't just sit there alone
She called her mother in tears and worried she'd wasted her
Beauty on a blind, old buffoon
Who's better off under a tomb
Her mother said cryin's no use
Every woman takes a little
Absence makes the heart grow fonder
If you ain't fond go wait a little longer
When you return be sure to ring my bell
Because you got lots of my things that I need to get
So if you get back and I ain't home yet
I'll leave a note tellin' you to go to Helen's Restaurant