Debbie: I have heard, among this clan, you are called the forgotten man
Iggy: is that what they're saying? well, did you evah!
Both: what a swell party this is

Iggy: and have you heard the story of a boy, a girl, unrequited love?
Debbie: sounds like pure soap opera I may cry
Iggy: aw
Both: what a swell party this is

Iggy: what frails
Debbie: what cocks
Iggy: what broads
Debbie: what jocks
Iggy: what furs, they're beautiful
Debbie: why, I've never seen such
Both: yuppity
Debbie: neither did I
Iggy: it's all just too
Both: swellegant

Debbie: this french champagne
Iggy: domestic
Debbie: so good for the brain
Iggy: that's what I was gonna say
Debbie: well, you know you're a brilliant fellow
Iggy: thank you, I am
Debbie: hehe, drink up jim

Iggy: so, have you ever been out to l.a. lately
Debbie: well no, not recently
Iggy: well, I went there and had a rent-a-car and all
Debbie: oh, really
Iggy: yeah and I got invited to pia's house. pia zadora's house
Debbie: really, oh
Iggy: yeah
Debbie: was it nice?
Iggy: well, I didn't, I didn't go
Debbie: oh, hehe
Iggy: it woulda been swell though
Debbie: shoulda gone
Iggy: it woulda been elegant
Debbie: elegant. oh wait, look, look who's coming in now, can you believe it?
Iggy: I hear they dismantled pickfair
Debbie: they did
Iggy: it wasn't elegant enough, hehe
Debbie: yeah, probably full of termites
Iggy: yeah

Both: it's great, it's grand
Wa wa wa wa wa wa wa wa wonderland
La la la la la la la la la la la la la.
We sing so rare like old camembert

Iggy: have you heard the dying star - she got bit in the astar bar
Debbie: sauced again, well, did you evah
Both: what a swell party this is

Have you heard?
It's in the stars
Next july we collide with mars
Well did you evah

What a swell party
What a swell party
What a swellegant elegant (sm) party

Debbie: smarty
Iggy: party, yeah
Debbie: a smarty party?
Iggy: I am, a smarty. I'm pretty smart
Debbie: you are a smarty for coming to this party
Iggy: yeah, that's right
Debbie: well piss off
Iggy: hehehe, that's good, I like that