My suspicions were alerted by a little bit of flirting
My beady eye caught it at a gig
Sally is my lover and he's the dogdrummer
I love them both but can I forgive
No, no, a double betrayal
Is something that I cannot forget
She thinks I'm all cool standing here on the stage
But between the sheets useless and inept

Wakey no, wakey no, wakey no!
Burn, burn, burn, burn

She looked pretty nice as I went to spend the night
Working on the graveyard shift
Feeling pretty tense I hid behind a fence
Dogdrummer arrived and they kissed
Just imagine what it's like with a length of steel pipe
As me size tens booted down the door
There, before me, naked and horny
They were shagging like rabbits on the floor

Without hesitation I trussed 'em to the bed
With several lengths of baler twine
I was kind of in a dream as I poured the gasoline
On dogdrummer and that fucking slut of mine
Now I am the judge and your punishments stern
I sentence you both to burn
Thou is a slut and thee is a liar
Now roast on a porky human pyre
And the moral of this story is...
Don't fuck another mans wife!