Ethel Cain
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Head in the Wall

Ethel Cain


Sometimes you make me wanna
put my fucking head through the wall
Sometimes I wonder if I even know you at all
Fall asleep to the sound of your old rotating fan
I cut the fuck out of myself
and soaked the bed sheets with blood again

I hold my head underwater just to drown out the noise
It's always my fault, girls will be bitches, and boys will be boys
I know I don't need you but I'm terrified of letting you go
Even after all the times
you fucked the shit out of me while I was crying "No "

And how am I supposed to feel good about myself
when everything I do is wrong
When I'm just an ugly bitch, a fucking freak
and I don't wanna go on
And I don't wanna leave my house
cause I know everybody's staring at me now
"Why the hell am I alive? " is what they think
they wanna take me down

And I can't get out, can't run away
there's no escaping you now
(There's no escaping you now)
I'm gonna die all alone, next to you, in this piece of shit town
And we've been cursed since the start
Jesus didn't want us, no
And you take all of your sins out on my body
like everyone else does
Shooting up our old school
when we get bored of shooting up
And fuck the cops, and fuck God
and fuck this town for ruining us
And they'll put holes in all we own
and in our heads, pumped full of lead
You always told me I could only leave you
once we're both dead

Sometimes you make wanna put my fucking head
through the wall
Sometimes I wonder if I ever even knew you at all

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