Bought a present for my guy
I bought him a pair of second hand boots
Those boots were white not pink
He liked to think, that he wore them well
He took them to the park, he wore them out
And played with the geese
Those geese were stupified
When he turned around and cried
That's not nice he said, that's not nice, what you did to me
That's not nice he said, that's not nice, the way you treat me
I'm alright he said, I'm alright, it's always been me
(Ah ah ah ah)

Hey you, what's-your-face
I have a pocket full of fists, you got a stupid face
Hey you, know your place
You're like Kentucky fried chicken but without the taste
Hey you, get some grace,
You know you're driving miss daisy all over the place
Hey you, you're taking up space
And you're a fucking disappointment to the human race (oh! )

And everybody knows, Summers Summers Summers Summers Summers' the man
He's got a Californian jacket and a fortified tan
He met a friendly face in the Isle of Man
And then he took it to the states and started a band
He took it to a sushi bar named G.I Joes
And then he took a bit of playdo and he stuck it up his nose

Summers Summers Summers Summers Summers Summers Summers Summers Summers Summers Summers Summers Summers Summer,
Jake Summers is the man, Jake Summers is the man,
He's the man with with the Californian jacket, his rock and roll band
Jake Summer Summer Summer Summer Summer Summer Summer Summer Summer
(Jake Summers is the man Jake Summers is the man he can do he can do it he can do he can with his rock and roll band Jake Summers is the man oh yeah what a fucking man he can take it to apollo with a plectrum in his hand)
He's the man

That's not nice he said, that's not nice, what you did to me
That's not nice he said, that's not nice, the way you treat me
I'm alright he said, I'm alright, it's always been me
FFFFUUUCCCKKK!

Hey cutie what's with your nose
Take the focus off, take off your clothes
Hey baby what's with this smile
You know he smells like ham and he tastes like bile
Hey baby where's your board you know you're a nightmare bunji breaking whore (?)
Hey baby you were the bedroom king
Well I'm so sorry for breaking your ding-a-ling-a-ling