WILBUR
Styles keep a changin'
The world's re-arrangin'
But Edna, you're timeless to me
Hemlines are shorter
A beer costs a quarter
But time cannot take what comes free

You're like a stinky old cheese, babe
Just gettin' riper with age
You're like a fatal disease, babe
But there's no cure
So let this fever rage

Some folks can't stand it
Say time is a bandit
But i take the opposite view
Cause when i need a lift
Time brings a gift
Another day with you
A twist or a waltz
It's all the same schmaltz
With just a change in the scenery
You'll never be old hat
That's that!
You're timeless to me

EDNA
Oh, Wilbur!

Fads keep a-fadin'
Castro's invading!
But wilbur, you're timeless to me
Hairdos are higher
Mine feels like barbed wire
But you say i'm chic as can be!

You're like a rare vintage ripple
A vintage they'll never forget
So pour me a teeny weenie triple
And we can toast the fact we ain't dead yet!
I can't stop eating
Your hairline's receding
Soon there'll be nothing at all
So, you'll wear a wig
While i roast a pig
Hey! Pass that geritol

Glenn miller had class
That chubby checker's a gas
But they all pass eventually
You'll never be passe
Hip hooray!
You're timeless to me

(They dance.)

EDNA
You're like a broken down chevy
All you need is a fresh coat of paint

WILBUR
And Edna, you got me goin' hot and heavy
You're fat and old, but baby, boring you ain't!

WILBUR & EDNA
Some folks don't get it
But we never fret it
'Cause we know that time is our friend
It's plain to see
That you're stuck with me
Until the bitter end

And we got a kid
Who's blowin' the lid
Off the turnblad family tree

EDNA
You'll always hit the spot
Big shot!
You're timeless to me

WILBUR
You'll always be du jour
Mon amour
You're timeless to me

EDNA
You'll always be first string

WILBUR
Ring-a-ding-ding!

WILBUR & EDNA
You're timeless to me

EDNA
You're timeless to me

WILBUR
You're timeless to me

WILBUR & EDNA
You're timeless to me!!