You don't suspect my life's a mess,
you prob'ly think it's groovy
Meeting people everyday,
see some place abroad...
And I admit that when the time is right,
it can be quite a laugh
But you know, that's not often
Eventually, I think that you will agree,
I'm only putting lines out
and shifting gears, missing years disappear

And as for you, I couldn't bear to think of it -
they said you were Swedish
You asked me for a chocolate bar,
then you went and spoiled it all by eating it
What a pain, what a nause!
You can imagine my delight
was like some R. Crumb magazine come to life
Thank you ladies you had us all
I hope you both enjoyed it

But just the same
I'm happy just to sit around at home
with Pamela making cups of tea and washing clothes
Now anyone could easily see
I'm basically a cretin

Bing billy bong - silly song's going wrong
Ping pong ping, clong cling dong
Tie me up, turn me on

Bing billy bang, desperate dan, frying pan
Cling clong cling, bong bing bang, Michael Miles, bogey man