[Verse 1]
It is difficult for you to be so beautiful
Or do you find the advantages
tend to outweigh the disadvantages?
Am I rude?
I'm sorry, I've never had the appropriate attitude
Do you think that life is easier
when looks as good as you do
Or do people always say that you're a narcissist
Do they ingratiate themselves to you and act all obsequious?
Come on now baby
you can tell it's just between the two of us

[Chorus]
Snug slacks baby snug slacks
Now you're giving me a different kind of panic attack
Sick joke, baby crack smoke
now take me out in your baby for a midnight poke
I said Stonehenge baby throw hands
Now you got me all down doubting who I am
Snug slacks baby snug slacks
Now let's get you out of those
and see what kind of punch your manhood packs

[Verse 2]
You know it takes an ass like yours
to make it possible for me
To have developed such a very high tolerance
for inappropriate behaviour
I mean I can take it or leave it, I don't need it
And I hope I haven't spoken out of turn
But if you'd be so kind
I could use some help with my thesis on the carpet burn
By the way I got tickets for us to see Joan Baez tonight
Oh? I guess I misunderstood
I never heard of Joan as Policewoman
But I do love me some Angie Dickinson
Let's be clear, Joan Baez
makes GG Allin look like Charlene Tilton

[Chorus]
Snug slacks baby snug slacks
Now you're giving me a different kind of panic attack
Sick joke, baby crack smoke
now take me out in your baby for a midnight poke
I said Stonehenge baby throw hands
Now you got me all down doubting who I am
Snug slacks baby snug slacks
Now let's get you out of those
and see what kind of punch your manhood packs