Oh, shit, god damn, I almost hit that little punk rock kid
Aw shit, god damn, what's happening here?
Damn helicopters
And all I saw was some little skater kid come running by with a test tube
One of them glass ones
Oh man, i'll check the news and find out what the hell's happening here
Fuckin' commercials, God Damn!

This is Victoria Secretion reporting live from Orange County California
When just moments ago, officer Jack Meoff in our chopper in the sky
Spotted rapper D-Loc member of the infamous KOTTONMOUTH comittee
Skating eastbound on Yorba Linda Blvd.
D-Loc has been at large, and is wanted by press, parents, and authorities
For being a nuisance to society
Approach with caution
D-LOC could be under the influence of a mind altering substence



It's me and my skate
skate, in this world of hate and confusion
I sweat all day to create an illusion
Or a fantasy, yeah that's what you call it
You play to skate you be a bong tokin' alcoholic
Well this come true, so i grip the mic tightly
And when im rockin' the stage, my skates beside me
After the show you'll catch me skatin' in the parking lot
Bustin' grinds and flips my board is all i got
To escape the realness of reality
I smoke a joint so i can cope with this insanity
They say sobriety's the answer to society
I say its anarchy but they ain't understanding me
I say it twice, but man just can't relate
I guess its fate, my boards my mate
Just, just me and my skate

In other breaking news
Reputed rapper Saint, also from the KOTTONMOUTH committee
Was caught by surveillance camera at JJ's Liquor in the city of Orange
Making off with 2 cases of beer, one pint of booze, and a carton of cigarettes
The unemployed rapper has outstanding charges of drunken rowdiness, inciting
riots, and abusive behavior
Saint was last spotted on Beach Blvd. jumping from a moving vehicle under the
influence of alcohol.



Now i just got off the phone with Big Hoss up in prison
Thank God for freedom, hook the bitches out my chissum
Name is brought in many girlies conversations
But it gets complicated with the situation in your face
My name is Saint, the one the girlies flock fool
But don't get mad, when you lady starts to jock me fool
Cuz its mad you wanna beer like marijuana
She said, "Hi Saint, my name's Lu-Juana
Lu wanna wanna wanna take me home?
Lu wanna wanna wanna lay and bone?
But i get aggravated, mentally frusrated
When i act like chin straps cuz your boyfriends player hated
Left jab, right hook, then i knocked him out
I hate player haters so i pissed in his mouth

Apparently local officals have turned the KOTTONMOUTH commitee case over to
the Federal Bureau of Investigations
The allusive orange county rappers, under the direction of PIMP DADDY X
Are saught in conection with a number of charges ranging from obscenity
Influecencing the minds of minors, fake IDs, lewd and crewd behavior
And demoralizing society
Right-wing religious zealots have apparently threatened to, quote
"Crucify those young punks"



Yo, i gotta scam with this ya know i gotta scam for that
The karma daddy spreads all good, but still i watch my back
Well i like the vibe, write a rhyme, to a funky phat track
I got the scam to get the green, a scam for a phat sack
Too many vices, insane extremities
I got no good solutions, or no quick remedies
Don't wanna slave my life working at a 9 to 5
Fuck flippin' burgers don't wanna drop no fries
Don't wanna move boxes, move shit or sit behind a desk
Just wanna get up on the mic and let my skills start to flick
Addicted to the homegrown, fly girls and bass tones
I'm not a loser, look at you, don't wanna be left alone
Additcted to the nicotine, a full time toker
Or more confused with mi vida loca
Late-night toker, indo smokas

Hey, Hey, Daddy X, Daddy X, Daddy X, Daddy X
Let your skills flex
Hey, Hey, Daddy X, Hey Daddy X
Put those fools in check

Live while you live, you gotta live your life while your here
Time is all i got, I wanna smoke the kind and guzzle beer
Fear of life at times, i guess but i ain't got no time for that
I got to kick it chill, i got to kick it chill to max
So when you see Daddy X in your vacinity, pass the pipe, pass the J
Say what's up, im out, peace

Me, Me and my skate
My skate, my mate my skate
Me, me and my skate
my mate in this world of hate

After an all out man hunt by local and federal officals
The Kottonmouth committee still remains at large
Last spotted fleeing southbound on interstate 5 in a drop top volkswagon bug
Believed to be stolen from a trailer park complex earlier today
The young vandals are disturbing the peace and reportedly riding high
Thats' the local news for now, we'll update you on the situation as it happens
I'm Victoria Secretions for KBUD, 420 on your dial
Now back to you Bob