[verse]
I got something in my head
A plate of steel
Oh yeah they said I was almost dead
I got something in my eye
I'd scratch it
But the cast has my good hand inside

She's a pretty little catch
I like the way her hair
Fits right inside her nurse's cap
Her breath smells like gum
Juicy, juicy fruit
If my jaw wasn't wired I'd have me some
And nothing good happens to me
Yeah nothing good happens to me

[chorus]
Baby I'm shakin' when you take care of me
But it's alright
Yeah it's alright
Maybe I'll make it out
We'll just have to see
It's alright, yeah it's alright

[verse]
The sun comes up and I'm alive
She holds the door
As the throng of visitors arrive
And when it's dust she brings me treats
The jello's old and warm
But her face is young and oh so sweet
And nothing good happens to me
Yeah nothing good happens to me

[chorus]
[bridge]
I will recover in the same way
I learned to ride my bike
I was five!

[verse]
The day it finally arrives
The cast comes off and I am no longer mummified
And there she is but there she goes
Another patient rolls in just as the door swings closed
And nothing good happens to me
Yeah nothing good happens to me

[chorus]