On a dark Tuesday evening sitting in my lair
Warm smell of zuchinnis rising up through the air
Downstairs in the kitchen I heard the clanging wok
My palms grew sweaty and I peed my pants
It was almost 6 o'clock

There I stood in the bathroom
I heard the dinner bell
And I was wondering to myself
If I was in some kind of stir fry hell
Then I got up the courage and I got me a plate
There were people screwing in the room next door
Looks like they would be late

Welcome to the Coop California
Such a messy place (such a messy place)
Plenty of food at the Coop California
Every kind of bean that you've ever seen

The agenda items were listed, it was an open forum
There were a lot of people in the house, but we couldn't get quorum
But we still called it a meeting, we didn't abort
Each officer took their turn giving a 30-minute report

So I called up to NASCO
Hey we're in a bind
And they said you haven't paid your member fees since 1989
And still that refrigrator is smellin from far away
Oh man I just can't wait
For work holiday...

Welcome to the Co-op California
Such a messy place (such a messy place)
Plenty of food at the Co-op California
What a nice surprise it's beans and rice!

All of a sudden it hit me, I got a weird sensation
And I said We are all just prisoners here of cooperation
And in the house accounting
The treasurer had been slack
They disconnected our electricity
And we just couldn't get it back

Last thing I remember I was feeling pretty lame
I put on my second wool sweater
And started to complain
Relax said my housemate
Sure this place is a mess
The food is bland and the bills unpaid
But we've still got house incest