Your life makes mine look like a real farce
I don't blame you for despising my job
You said that men like me can't make their mind up
I think you're wrong, but I can't decide

And when we went swimming
They made us sign a form
In case we drowned

When I look back I won't wallow
I've done that shit before and it don't sit right
You always had the knack to laugh in sorrow
And even a mortician sees the funny side
So do I

You have it in for all Americans
You don't like when I use their words for things
Well, that's the joy of being half-Canadian
You get the worst of both worlds, it's the best

And I when had the jab
You interlocked our hands
In case I passed out

When I look back I won't wallow
I'll do my best to not romanticize
And every bird above is not a sparrow
And even a mortician sees the funny side
So do I
So do I
So do I

Oh, they can see the funny side and so can I
Oh, they can see the funny side and so can I