Is she dope? Yep, ass in full effect, she walks into the room and all the guys come down with strep, thinking they can step, their hands get wet with sweat, but she been down with me since Fett's Vette. She's a hard drinker, lollipop licker, pistol packin' mama got me posed like the thinker, she's gold like the Aztecs or is it the Incas, she calls the shot and the shot be cunnilingus. She's heaven sent on the Xbox playing Halo, wish that she would clean my pipes like she was draino, wish she wasn't hotter than a plate of jalapenos, I feel like a kid that wants to eat like it's play-dough, you shouldn't, 'cause that shit be bad for your health, take one look at her and you'll be screaming for help, call up the police, say put me in a cell, I can't resist this dish, I'm under Emily's spell, if you couldn't already tell, I loved every iota, Yoda shoulda told me she was off to South Dakota, one more yacht bird flew the coop I guess old Gordy done screwed the pooch.

Only thing I love more
Than herb is the bird
But my luck's kinda fucked
It's a wonder that I flirt

But I do and I will
'Cause I'm still just a nerd
Ever been left behind
Let me hear ya say word

Only thing I love more
Than herb is the bird
But my luck's kinda fucked
It's a wonder that I flirt

But I do and I will
'Cause I'm still just a nerd
Ever been left behind
Let me hear ya say word

She's a go getter, dressed in sweater, we watched Blackhawk down together, her name's Heather, there's no better, didn't want her to go, but I had to let her, I started a yacht club, can't believe she showed up. Scholiosis chick, one fake tit, always bitin' her lip, always walkin' with a limp, always talkin' shit, always beggin' to kiss 'cause you can't resist the lips of an MC Chris. We only had a month to hump, it was rough, she was the first one that brought over a toothbrush, she missed home, horses in the barn, life was sucking so Kentucky was pulling her arm, just one bird that got away, keep up to date by checking her LJ, on my birthday, she bought me chucks, not only does it blow, it totally sucks.

Only thing I love more
Than herb is the bird
But my luck's kinda fucked
It's a wonder that I flirt

But I do and I will
'Cause I'm still just a nerd
Ever been left behind
Let me hear ya say word

Only thing I love more
Than herb is the bird
But my luck's kinda fucked
It's a wonder that I flirt

But I do and I will
'Cause I'm still just a nerd
Ever been left behind
Let me hear ya say word

Her name was LB
she was an actress
I filled up her
spaces like madlibs

way above average
she was just a sad kid
so I couldn't help
but give the girl my address

she lived in Texas
like to get messed up
like to tease the boys
so she always got dressed up

like to get in fights
with the truckers at the rest stops
she was top notch
and her bod was the best part

fan of mine, summer time
dropping me a line
sounded kinda cute
couldn't help but reply

chilling in her pool
squinting at the sky
cell phone rings
MC Chris says hi

soon we're talking everyday
flirtin' up a storm
plans to road trip
I say word is born

and my mind's set on porn
and I think I'm gonna score
I get down on all fours
start scrubing all the floors

then I get all nervous
that an accident is imminent
never have a chance to relax
and get intimate

arrives at my drive
I sigh, get all shy
so we all get all high
walk down to little five

do a shot, buy some pot
take a seat on the street
she's cute and she's nice
and she's hot and she's sweet

and she makes the first move
'cause I'm set on defeat
then I tongue lap her flaps
'til she snaps and she screams

and she just leaves
and I'm kinda relieved
no OD's, VD's
hearts on my sleeve

not a stalker just a talker
ass tight as weave
once a newbie now a groupie
double clickin' on me

Only thing I love more
Than herb is the bird
But my luck's kinda fucked
It's a wonder that I flirt

But I do and I will
'Cause I'm still just a nerd
Ever been left behind
Let me hear ya say word

Only thing I love more
Than herb is the bird
But my luck's kinda fucked
It's a wonder that I flirt

But I do and I will
'Cause I'm still just a nerd
Ever been left behind
Let me hear ya say word