The first time I saw the Descendents,
They were the fastest band I'd ever seen.
No one in the crowd really cared for them,
We were waiting for the Alley Cats to play.
After a couple months I heard Kabuki Girl,
On Rodney on the Roq late Sunday night.
That was enough, for me I hopped the bus,
To licorice pizza and bought my all time favorite record.

The next time I went to the whiskey,
It was DOA with millions of Dead Cops.
The latter band played faster than I could believe,
But the Songs sounded the same and kinda sucked.
'Cept John Wayne was a nazi,
And Joey Shithead was a drunk.
Then John Macias beat some hippie to a pulp,
Cuz Having long hair was a mistake.

The third time I went to the hospital,
I needed 13 stitches in my head.
I managed to catch about 6 songs of Ill Repute,
Then some suicidal threw me into a post.
My girlfriend started to cry cuz we had to leave,
Before DRI played 50 lousy songs.
My blood stained shirt smelled of clove cigarettes,
But it sure looked pretty cool after a wash.