I never thought I'd be so mean
I never thought I'd be alone at 19
all these thoughts are in my head again head again
all these thoughts are running through my brain and out the door
I'd rather be done then saying
I'd rather be numb and in pain
but you can't see all the things I'm going through
rather be dumb and saying I'd rather be numb than in pain
but you can't see all the shit I'm going through

Oh no oh no oh no oh no
I hide my pain inside
oh no oh no oh no oh no
I bleed to feel alive
oh no no no no no
I am dead inside makes it hard to survive

No you can't find my reasons
no you can't find my pain
we all got lost in Jesus
but he can't take away my pain
I'm looking for something more
something to take me a from out your door
I'm looking for you outside to say say ah ah

Oh no oh no oh no oh no
I hide my pain inside
oh no oh no oh no oh no
I bleed to feel alive
oh no no no no no I am dead inside ohh

No I can't take it all these memories
I can't fake it I'm trying but I am dying
I just want to be myself
I have tried to but now I'm someone else

Oh no no no no no so please be kind
oh no oh no oh no no because I'm losing my mind
oh no no no no no yeah I'm really not fine yeah I'm really not fine

We live in an age where sex and horrors are gods
we live in an age where all of our bodies are flawed

No I can't take it all these memories
I can't fake it I'm trying but I am dying
I just want to be myself
I have tried to but now I'm someone else