Last summer I was bored
I had a restless soul
I needed a change of scenery

And so I went to France
Thought I might find romance
On every boulevard and street

Next thing I knew I was way off of the ground
The nightmare started when my plane touched down

Chorus
I want to be there
I want to be there to see
I want to be there to see Paris when it burns

I wore a French beret
I lived on wine and cheese
Slept in an attic full of rats

I ate their crazy food
I acted twice as rude
I used perfume made out of cats

I tried and tried but I just could not fit in
I was the ugliest American

Chorus

Down to the ground
The Eifel Tower is falling down
While an accordian plays
The Marseilles

I met this mademoiselle
Told me to go to Hell
Didn't understand a word she said

I tried to storm her beach
But she was out of reach
Dumped her Chablis upon my head

And as I stumbled down the Champ Elysees
I swore that I'd be home by Labor Day

Chorus