Well, the kids are playing in an old refrigerator
And you're face down on the floor
Grandma's just as drunk as you are
Grandpa's blind and driving

Chorus
I can't get the toast out of here
I can't get it out
I can't get the toast out of here
But if I had a fork then I could get the toast out of here
If I had a fork then I could get the toast out of here

Well, the kids are playing with a pack of matches
And a pile of oily rags
You're laying down on the operating table
From carrying scissors from running

Chorus

Well, the kids are dropping out of junior high school
And you're drinking beer through a straw
Grandpa's plotting to kill the President
Grandma's with her pimp
Me, I'm waiting for the next Big Bang
To blow everything to bits
We all get together on Christmas Day and sing Joy To The World
We all get together on Christmas Day and sing Joy To The World

Chorus