Baljeet: Good King Wenceslas looked out
On the feast of Stephen

Buford: Sorry I'm late. I was busy doin' some rewrites
Baljeet: Rewrites?
Buford: I've highlighted your parts. Now sing along

Buford: Santa Claus and all his elves
Are making gifts for Buford
Baljeet: I don't think that's how it goes
Buford: Nobody's askin' you, nerd

Baljeet: Buford!
You're completely disrespecting this classic song.
You're ignoring the historical context.
King Wenceslas was a great man.
You have no idea what this song is about!
Buford: I know all about this song

Buford: The words were by an English guy
The music, Scandinavian
Wenceslas was five-foot-six
He kept his face unshaven
Though just a duke throughout his life
He always ruled so justly
His kingly title was conferred
Upon him posthumously

Baljeet: Well, I stand corrected.
You seem to have a lot of information.
But if you know so much about it,
why do you not sing the original song?
Buford: I like my version better. It's about me!

Buford: Buford should get lots of gifts
Every Christmas season
When I see presents just for me
It always is so pleasin'
That is why I changed the words
To make the song more edgy
If you don't like the way I sing
You'll get a Christmas wedgie
Baljeet: Oh, it's lovely. You're a veritable
Oscar Hammerstein the Second, or uh...
oh, well, at least it's over!