Yo, here's a big story 'bout Boston and cold tea It was me Dougie P and Jeff we call him Kenney Left from the Port on the Peter Pan Trailways Chillin' with Doug's parents for a coupla days
Pat and Dave yeah that was Dougie's folks Doug asked for the wagon but his dad said nope We wanted to jet but Dave sparked the barbeque So we ate up the chicken and then we cut loose
Pat drove the wagon yeah into town She was off to catch the Boston Pops symphony sound We thanked her for the ride and she gave Doug some money She said don't forget the subway closes at 12:30
Headed to the bar but I had no I.D. I had to flirt with the bouncer just to gain entry Had a few here and we had a few there Bustin' all that shit in Harvard Square
Cold Tea-I need it Shit Goddamn
12 rolled around and we was feelin' loose Then the bartender says he's stoppin' sellin' the juice All the bars here close at 1 am so it's time to head out back to the suburbs again But Kenny wouldn't have it he was rarin' to go So for the after-hours we decided to scope Asked all the locals where's the place to be They said ya gotta go to Chinatown and ask for cold tea
We were real psyched so we hopped the taxi Spotted our place it was called the Dynasty Smiled at the waiter, ordered cocktails for 3 He said we got the pork fried rice but we don't have no cold tea We was real bummin' but we needed a snack So we ordered on up the fancy Pu-Pu Plat Ate all the grease from that crazy platter We had no cold tea we was just gettin' fatter!
Cold-T-Give it to me! Shit Goddamn
We had no more money yeah and nowhere to go It was just us on the street with some bums, some hoes Then these Boston hicks stumbled onto the street They was lookin' to do something that was 'neat' They said we don't know what to do, do you I said we're not from here, what the fuck is new What is up with this Boston town There ain't nothin' to do but but sit your butt on the ground My butt was real tired I was on the concrete so I said yo let's go to Park Street
We got in the hicks' car they was drivin' real fast They was all juiced up, foot was glued to the gas I thought we were gonna die for sure So I motioned to my crew, I unlocked the door He said don't worry honey I'm an Amtrack Conducter And do you have a friend as cute as you, I'd like to fuck her I said to them yo ya'alls all dorks Get me on that Peter Pan back to New York!!!