I wasn't right within, was lyin' tryna find a slim openin' To cope with grim realities of hopelessness The casualties of broken men, unhappily devoted when They hit me, all the walls were tryna kiss me they were closin' in I'm soakin' in a tub of how the fuck did this all happen? Can I fasten my seatbelt before the tree and me are wrapped in A blanket I can't escape? But the brakes that I have ain't brakin' And the weight that I feel is achin' they say we don't feel the same shit The pain isn't real, I'm famous, the cage that I'm in is dangerous I'm chained, the perception anxious every day I'm faced the anguish Of fakin' and savin' faces, so drainin', I pray it changes Self-hatred's an understatement for makin' the bed I lay in My faith and my patience shaken, I'm cravin' a new awakenin' I'm chasin' myself, I'm wavin', complainin' that I'm evadin' Betrayin' myself was strainin' and slayed by my past, I'm racin' That ancient indoctrination, I'm blazin' whatever's failin' And scrapin' up the remainin', be shapin' my soul creatin' Embracin' the new foundation, no swayin', no more decayin' The process of excavation, surveillin' what needs replacin' This daily, can't get complacent, I'm takin' solo vacations I need solitude, I think a bottle too, many problems due To not wanting to upset my family, plus I got the news That sadness ain't allowed from the same crowd that turns around And asks for sad songs, tell me how 'cause as a man, you cannot frown Don't make a sound, just a stand up proud No one appreciatin' us until we're dead and underground It's no surprise that suicide is super high it's not unusual 'Cause men know that they only get their flowers at their funeral We're hardenin' ourselves instead of gardennin' ourselves Suppressed emotions, we're alone so now we're targetin' ourselves Don't wanna talk to out of pride, in fear of comin' off weak Some women lookin' at you lesser if there's tears on your cheek But if there's tears tattooed, that same girl is a freak So they attracted to the pain unless they hear the pain speak Society romanticizin' silent sufferers, stoicism is sexy Unless he can't show that he fucks with her, if that's your girl, be done with her 'Cause if you're numb to the pain then you're numb to the pleasure Whether it's sun or it's rain to you it's all the same weather These days I'm better off retreated and reserved On a resort, then re-emerge feelin' recharged and reassured that I'm Enough
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