(Difford/Tilbrook)

Give me a plate and I'd break it
Show me a smile and I'd cry
Give me your love and I'd hate it
Tell me the truth and I'd lie
Give me a crust and I'd burn it
Show me the way and I'd shout
Give me a page and I'd turn it
Well you could never put me down

Misunderstood like a cockroach
(As tasty as a crab)
Who just tries to live for the day
(My world’s on my back)
People won't need to be frightened
(As frightened as I am)
Excepting I was born this way
Don't sweep me under the carpet
(Tomorrow I’ll be there)
Don't file me away for my sins
(There’s some I can repair)
Friends are now beginning to say
(So pleased with their despair)
How come I don't talk to him
I didn't talk to him

Give me an egg and I'd suck it
Show me the sun and I'd freeze
Give me a nest and some honey
Keep all the birds and the bees, please
Helplessness under my wing
People said don't talk to him