Well we worship at the shroud of Elvis
And we're waiting for that money from Ed McMahon
And we're drinking from the Perrier fountain of youth
While we follow what the daily horoscopes saying
Taking lethal doses of MTV
Delving into pet psychiatry
Trying to treat cancer with a fruit juice cure
And waiting for the Beatles reunion tour

'Cuz it's a great big stupid world
And we're feeling kinda queasy as it turns around
Great big stupid world
And we're never really sure if we're up or down
We're on a dirt clod out in space
Where it stops nobody knows
If Jesus came back today
They'd try to book him on the Oprah Winfrey show
'Cuz it's a great big stupid world
Great big stupid world

Well we're hot on the trail of Big Foot
And we're wearing the crystals to feel the power
We're hoping that the creatures from outer space
Come to set us free in that final hour
Trying to tell the future from the lumps on our heads
Getting melanoma from our tanning beds
Channeling Houdini with Shirley MacLaine
And trying to figure out what the dolphins are saying

Well it's a Great-Big-Stupid world
Dumb dumb da dumb dumb baby it's a stupid world
It's a great big stupid, great big stupid
Great big stupid world

Well we're studying the National Enquirer
Is it true Sonny Bono is the Anti-Christ
We debate if T.V. wrestling is really a sport
While we're testing rock 'n' roll and it's effect on mice
Bonding with our little computer screens
Getting anorexic on our Lean Cuisines
Turning plastic surgeons into millionaires
So everybody finally gets to look like Cher

It's a great big stupid world
And we're feeling kind of queezy as it turns around
Great big stupid world
And we're never really sure if we're up or down

It's a great... big... stupid world
Dumb dumb da dumb dumb baby it's a stupid world