There’s a really neat trick I learned when you’re dead
You can walk through walls and not hurt your head
Bedrooms and bathrooms are all fair game
So I followed some prefects and spied without shame

Bathrooms are great places for peep shows
Cedric Diggory’s really hot without his clothes
A screeching egg’s secret he was trying to find
He knew I was watching but he didn’t seem to mind

Death is way more fun with bubbles
That’s what I say
Death is way more fun with bubbles
Mostly every day
Death is way more fun with bubbles
Myrtle likes to play
Death is way more fun with bubbles
When they melt away
Prefects are freakin hot in any season
You know they call me Moaning Myrtle for a reason

Went looking for some prefects in the bathroom one day
But instead I found Harry and so I said hey
I helped him solve the mystery of the egg
But I’d like to solve the mystery between his legs

I hope that Harry drowns tomorrow in the lake
So that our honeymoon we can take
You know that ghosts have working ‘natomies
What’s better than that - we don’t get STD’s!

Prefects are hot etc.