while i’m / working to afford to have fun with you i’m distracted to / stillness by the thinking of you from beach to top mountains paula this / indistinguished suburb grinds my sleep teeth to ruin & powder you know it to be / true you heard it held me woke me close whispered how it’ll be soon you said / worry baby sleepy head cut back to / me young and unpressured in contrast to aunts and to uncles 8 & 10 / older at the cusp of adulthood away walk from play time i knew then of / those days gold status how they’d look back to fix their hearts worn and yet here i am write of when i had so many they were of no value when laid unnumbered end to end / but it’s not getting any good that’s a bandage / that we’ve been using best of a decade / not while we’re here in secaucus bound let’s stop pretending / in never endings another decade / or until we’re out of the hope you found let’s abandon / this house to camden messed up a decade / let’s get away from these home and towns cause something’s missing / we hide by kissing rest up a decade / we’ll need our strength to escape this town can’t tell myself from hopes i’ve drowned / can’t tear myself from this safety town can’t tell each other from stupid clowns