I'm heartsick and well rehearsed
Highly decorated with a badge
That reads "it could be worse"
So prideful I choose to live in disguise
With a levee set for my heavy eyes

I apologize for the grief
When you'd refuse to eat
I didn't know just what to say
While watching you wither away
I'm homesick and living in the past
Seemingly unfazed and strong if anyone asks
I'm keeping up appereances with white lies
With a levee set for my heavy eyes

I apologize for the grief
When you'd talk about belief
I didn't know just what to say
While watching you wither away

It was time this whole time
We can't undo or rewind

Just a simple conversation
About nothing much at all
Couldn't keep me in the room
I just kept walking down the hall
But now I understand just
What a fool I'd been
No matter what the context
I won't have that time again
(and I live with that)

I took inventory of what I took for granted
And I ended up with more than I imagined
I've kept it bottled up
And to myself in the cellar
Kept for my everchanging mental health