Phil: yo man Grant: yo Phil: open up man Grant: what do you want man? Phil: Someone just shot me Grant: You let them shoot you? Phil: I don't know how I let this happen Grant: do you know who? Phil: no, I don’t, you know? Grant: man... Phil: I don't know what to do Grant: say it wasn't you Phil: alright... chorus 1 (Phil) Someone shot me and I caught them red-handed creeping behind a hedge Picture this, they were hiding and shot and I fell off the edge How could I forget that that someone wanted to kill me? All this time I was standing there they shot at me (Grant) You should have seen who it really was It must have been hard, though, you had just been shot You better watch your back before they do it again Otherwise you may be falling down the drain Do you have a clue who it really was? Never believe them, you my get cross chorus 2 Phil: but they shot me on the doorstep Grant: it wasn't me Phil: fell down and must have misstepped Grant: it wasn't me Phil: Ian Beale thought I was drunk Ian: it wasn't me Phil: He just left me like junk Grant: it wasn't me Phil: Mark Fowler threw fruit Mark: It wasn’t me Phil: he’s too fruity to shoot Grant: it wasn't me Phil: Maybe it was Stevie Owen Grant: it wasn't me Phil: Maybe he kept on going’ (chorus 1) I had tried to keep Mum from what she was about to see Why should I believe them when they tell me ‘It wasn’t me’ (Grant) Tell me who they are and I’ll knock their heads off Make ‘em look like a picture by Van Gogh It may seem funny, but you just got shot It may seem funny but it really is not Whoever did the crime didn’t do it very well They were supposed to shoot you dead and shoot you good as well Mitchell, your answer: go over there but if you pack a gun, take that, not Mel How could I forget that someone wanted to kill me? All this time I was standing there they shot at me They got to tell me that they’re sorry for the thing that they’ve done Of course I’m gonna tell the cops they shot me with a big gun We should tell them that they’re bad at aiming in the head You may think that I‘m a goody but I should be dead (chorus 1)