In lipstick on the mirror are the lyrics to my obituary
In iambic pentameter, follow parameter
Crossing my Is, dot my Ts

I was delivered holding scissors
I live deliberately, I'm a quitter
And a winner, anyway
'Cause I never agreed to participate in this game
Won't follow my dreams 'cause they all got me waking up screaming
I can let them go from me
After all, there's no I in team

And I'd rather be normal, yeah, so normal
I suggest that we keep this informal
'Cause a normal human being wouldn't need
To pretend to be normal, to be normal
Well, I get that that's the least that I owe you
To be normal in a way I couldn't be, yeah
Come on, come on and love me normally

If I could live in third person
Well, I don't think life would be much worse than it is
In the current tense, presently, listen consenting
With question marks or dot dot dot

Is it courageous or escapist to leave
The quarantine when you're contagious?
It may just be a cold
And besides, I don't want to get old, yeah
I drank myself to death to be the afterlife of the party
When the after-party came, I was rolling in my grave!

And I'd rather be normal, yeah, so normal
I suggest that we keep this informal
'Cause a normal human being wouldn't need
To pretend to be normal, to be normal
Well, I get that that's the least that I owe you
To be normal in a way I couldn't be, yeah
Come on, come on and love me normally

Now this is the part of the song where I like talk to me audience
I like to tell them 'em there's something I want
from you hep cats tonight
I want you to look to your left, look to your right
Your 12 o'clock, 3 o'clock, 6 o'clock
9 o'clock, rock around the clock tonight
And I want you to find those points of no return
Those singularities, those burning rings of fire
In the beatiful pupils and the beautiful eyes
Of the beautiful boy, girl, neither, both
Or in-between that you brought with you tonight
And I want you to teel 'em how you really feel
I want you to love the way they so seamlessly
Like a dream for me, so beautifully, oh so dutifully
Jam that square peg in the round hole in their hearts!

I want you to tell 'em that you love the way
That they don't stick out like sore middle fingers
That they crawl their way up the side of the bell curve
Stick their flag in the peak
And slide their way back down!
I want you to tell them that you love the way
That they're no maladaptive, not malcontent
Not malignant or maleficent
But rather that you love them
Exactly the way that everybody else is

I was nothing before, so I couldn't have asked to be born
I'll be nothing again, so what am I between now and then?
Is there nothing to fear?
'Cause this shit's getting weird
So to god, who made this man
You better have one hell of a plan, oh

'Cause I'd rather be normal, yeah, so normal
I suggest that we keep this informal
'Cause a normal human being wouldn't need, no
To pretend to be normal, to be normal
Well, I get that that's the least that I owe you
To be normal in a way I couldn't be, yeah
So come on, come on, yeah, I said come on, yeah
Come on, come on, yeah, I said come on, yeah
Come on, come on and love me normally, woah, yeah, whoa yeah
Come on, come on and love me normally