Ooh, I love eatin’ cereal
When I’m watchin’ my cartoons
Ooh, I love Fruity Pebbles
When I’m watchin’ my cartoons
Ooh, I love Super Sugar Crisp
When I’m watchin’ my cartoons
Ooh, I love Count Chocula
When I’m watchin’ my cartoons

Let’s go
Pour the milk in the bowl
Make sugars ice cold
Put my hand on the top
So it don’t overflow
Forget playing outside
With my friends from school
It’s Saturday morning, fool!
But you know what ain’t cool (what?)
Wakin’ up first
’Cause all that be on the tube
Is the Snorks and Smurfs
(?), Strawberry Shortcake, the worst
But comin’ up next
Was my boy, Johnny Quest
Sim Sim Salabim
But Fat Albert was the best
The Brown Hornet Picture Pages
Made me want to write graffiti
I had to do it when
Davey and Goliath couldn’t see me
Always tryin’ to do right they’d be hangin’ out with Dudley
But I watched Wacky Races
Rootin’ for my dog, Muttley.
You know what really bugged me? (What?)
Colbots was whack
Man, they bit the Transformers
And that’s a well-known fact
But...
After these messages we’ll be right back...

Ooh, I love eatin’ cereal
When I’m watchin’ my cartoons
Ooh, I love to eat Frosted Flakes
When I’m watchin’ my cartoons
Ooh, I love to eat Alphabits
When I’m watchin’ my cartoons
Ooh, I love King Vitamans
When I’m watchin’ my cartoons

I remember Teen Wolf tried to go vegetarian
Told Thundar he was a sick barbarian
For eatin’ Tiger Sharks with his Ninja Turtle soup
Because of that the Herculoids had to kick him out the group
Yo, there used to be drama on the afterschool scene
Tiny Toons started beefin’ with Beverly Hills Team
But the Get Along Gang would come through and make amends
And by the end of the week, they were all Super Friends
But GI Joe would get riled up again
Guns out, lookin’ for weapons of mass destruction
Harassin’ SilverHawks for little or nothing
Of course, the Care Bears wouldn’t have the heart to do somethin’
I called Motron and his Inhumanoids
The Superions wouldn’t let the Jols be destroyed
No, even in Cartoons Americana can’t be packed
But at least we know now, and know it’s half the battle

Ooh, I love to eat cereal
When I’m watchin’ my cartoons
Ooh, I love to eat Honeycombs
When I’m watchin’ my cartoons
Ooh, I love to eat Cookie Crisp
When I’m watchin’ my cartoons
Ooh, I love to eat Fruit Loops
When I’m watchin’ my cartoons

Now, right before we go
I think you got the right to know about Shira
On the low
She was a Thundercat ho
Or a go tryin’ to cover up and say she got a man
But he lied
It was really one of Jem’s Holograms
After that, God knows she went around the back
And found out Josie sellin’ pussy to cats
Chargin’ three, two, one for a little contact
Because Hong Kong Phooey had the illest pimp slap
Her sweet Jabber Jaws went to the highest bid
But what made it worse was she incorperated kids
So, Marshall Bravestarr came through with Captain Power
And vowed that She-Force would shut ‘em down within the hour
Until Chip ‘N Dale and the Rescue Rangers
Came through to save them hos with a mouse named Danger
To make things stranger
She still gets a ho(?)
Let a ho be a ho
And that’s one to grow on

Ooh, I love eatin’ cereal
When I’m watchin’ my cartoons
Ooh, I love Crushed Berry
When I’m watchin’ my cartoons
Ooh, I love Rice Krispies
When I’m watchin’ my cartoons
Ooh, I love to eat Golden Grahams
When I’m watchin’ my cartoons
Ooh, I love to eat Apple Jacks
When I’m watchin’ my cartoons
Ooh, I love to eat Cheerios
When I’m watchin’ my cartoons
Ooh, I love to eat Tricks
When I’m watchin’ my cartoons
Ooh, I like Cap’n Crunch
When I’m watchin’ my cartoons

[laughter]
And you know I can’t live without my cereal
[laughter]
And you know I can’t live without my cereal