SALLY:
Look at me, with my pigtails so tight,
Youd think that I might explode right?
Look at me, with my arms in a twist,
Not alarming I missed the right road

MS. COOTER:
Its not to late, to turn around
And find a better way

SALLY:
Its not up to fate to lay the groundwork
For a better day!

MS. COOTER
You gotta shake it up, put your hair down darlin
You really need to unwind.

SALLY: I gotta pick it up cause my life is calling
me on the other line.
Its time to start over
And today is like the first day of the year.
So get that chip off your shoulder,
Cause its weighing me down and keeping you right here

MS. COOTER:
I want to get out, see the great big world out there

BOTH:
Its time to set out, cause I feel-- theres something in the air
I might be that be losing my mind, but theres one thing that I know
That Im finally ready, Im ready to go!

SALLY: Im finally ready, so ready tooo

(dialogue)

JOEY:
Hey dick, does my hair look alright?

DICK:
Oh, man, buddy, youre a sight to see

JOEY:
(spoken) K good, (sung) Heres the deal, just try to relax,
Cause a mishaps the last thing I need.
I wanna rise up to the next level
Get off this middle ground.
Ive got this yearnin, burnin like the devil.
Im here for the rebound
Pass the ball, I know Im on fire

DICK:
Yeah, yeah youre on a roll

JOEY:
(spoken) I KNOW!

DICK:
(spoken/sung) What do you want of your kingdom, sire?

JOEY:
I wanna take control,

JOEY & DICK:
(Hyo!)

JOEY:
I need a brand new game plan!
No more warming benches like Ive done before.

DICK:
Getchyo head in the game, man!
Heres what Im thinking

JOEY:
Shit, shes comin out that door

JOEY, DICK, CHORUS:
Ahhhhhhhhhh

JOEY:
Say yes, Vanessa yes, I do confess
Of my obsession with your design
I will not rest, no, not unless
I find a way to make you mine
(Sigh)
Im gonna get her if its the last thing that I do

DICK:
But just remember that you cant get her

JOEY & DICK: without you/me too!
So buckle up, all you amateurs
Cause today were goin pro
Were finally ready, yeah, were ready to go!

VANESSA:
Hello?

TIFFANY:
Hey Vaness, OMG, would you guess,
that Im not wearing undies today?

VANESSA:
Eww. Oh Tiff, LOL, whats the diff,
You would still take em off anyway.

TIFFANY:
IKR

VANESSA:
BTW,

BOTH:
Where are you right now?

TIFFANY:
We need to talk--

VANESSA:
Oh, I totes see you,

BOTH:
BRB ciao ciao

(dialogue)

OLD SNATCH:
When youve been around the block as much as I have,
You feel just like a CEO

FLOPSY:
(spoken) Hows that? That must feel good?

OLD SNATCH:
You see, Im done with all these cocks,
But theyre not lettin me retire,
I tell ya, Im ready to go!

(dialogue)

FLOPSY:
Its like living the same way that an old pair of shoes do
Every days a one man show!
They start to STINK, then theres HOLES,
And they dont FIT the way they used to
IVE HAD IT! Im ready to go

OLD SNATCH:
Look at us,
Were just a couple of stiffs

FLOPSY:
(now youre just being cute)

OLD SNATCH:
With a lifetime of ifs.

FLOPSY:
(Dont be so hard on us)

OLD SNATCH:
And I wonder, with someone else, could be more fair?

FLOPSY:
Yeah! Its not like
were some one-dick pony.

OLD SNATCH: (oh, whos the cute one now?)

FLOPSY:
We could be more if only

BOTH:
Someone out there, would answer our prayer!

TOGETHER:
While we wait to be delivered, go ahead, cry me a river
We agree that theres no quid pro quo
So until that great vacation, save your tears for lubrication,
And lord have mercy, are we ready to go!
Mercy, are we ready to go.

(dialogue)

TIFFANY:
Listen up, Vanessa, sweetie,
I do this cuz I care.

VANESSA:
(spoken) I know.

TIFFANY:
This is war. Forget your peace treaty!
Justice is right over there!

VANESSA:
I guess I could use a new guy
Cuz its been a while and I am still so young,
Why not give it a try.
At the very least it could be kinda fun.

TIFFANY:
Hey now, Vanessa, theres the girl I know and love.

VANESSA: Ive been so boring, boy Im glad-I had a little shove!

BOTH:
Tic tock, while the irons hot
Theres no time to take it slow
You gotta be ready, so Ready to Gooo (repeats)

ALL:
We're finally ready
and the time is right for us to light a spark.
Were keepin' it steady, with our
Eyes on the prize, to get us through the dark.
I know theres so much more to what I think I see
I feel a change, and the strange thing is-- its part of me!
My hormones are freakin out,
And I think Im gonna blow!

JOEY AND DICK: Were locked and loaded

SALLY AND MS. COOTER: Oh, so devoted

SNATCH & FLOPSY: low and demoted,

VANESSA & TIFFANY: Totes, just toted!

ALL:
Were finally ready,
So ready to go!!