Do middle-aged women wear cameo brooches?
Do young office lechers drive clapped out old Porches?
Do sales girls at Tescos wear Boots N°7?
Do you eat Digestives at half past eleven?
Do you act your age
Or the size of your shoes?
Has a man got to do
What a man's got to do?

The things we do
The things we do
The things we do
The things we do

Do Leyland car workers vacate in Majorca
Do Daily Star crosswords while they're on the toilet?
Do you talk in riddles or verbal diarrhea?
Do you drink real ale then drown in your beer?
Is this what we are
Is there nothing inside?
If you swallow your food
Would you swallow your pride?

The things we do
The things we do
The things we do
The things we do

Do hip social workers wear militant badges
To show their beliefs on their courdory jackets?
Do students drive Citroens on their three year courses?
Do you spend your weekends flogging dead horses?
Do you act your age
Or the size of your shoes?
Has a man got to do
What a man's got to do?

The things we do
The things we do
The things we do
The things we do