Just the other day,
My dad walked in on me,
It really caught me off,
Cause he caught me jacking off,
And he was as embarrassed as me.

He said,
Son, youre just a growing boy,
Your just going through some changes,
Like the other boys.

Later on that week,
My dad walked in on me,
I was practicing my kicks,
And my crazy ninja flips,
He didnt understand what hed seen.

He said,
Son, what the fuck is wrong with you?
Are you out of your fucking mind?
Whats with the hunting hat?

He took me down the street,
And sat me down with the local shrink.
She said Im just a fool,
Trying to be cool,
With my friends peer pressuring me

She said,
Steve, your wearing womans jeans
Your hairs a fucking wreck,
Whats with the hunting hat?

Well fighting invisible ninjas never seemed weird to me,
I think its kind of cool,
Just dancing likes a fool,
And I dont give a fuck what you think.

I know when you were young like me,
You were tripping out on LSD,
You were hanging with your friends,
Getting fucked up in the head,
And that shit sucks to me.

Someone call the auto club,
Cause theirs about,
To be a breakdown.

Hunting hat!
Where the Fucks my hunting hat?
Did you take my hunting hat?
I know you took my hunting hat!!!!

I never played football,
I never got into college,
I never caught a pass,
I never took a cheerleader home.

I never studied much,
I just pounded beers with my best friends.

Im 24 years old and I still live
With my parents at home.

Ive come to think Im a loser
I might as well blow out my brains.
She said Im just a fool,
Trying to be cool,
With my friends peer pressuring me