In the keep of Gwar much torment remained Despite all the bodies hacked in twain So many had died in the viscous campaign That the femurs alone made a fine mountain
The master was no longer Gwar's sovereign Of wealth and women they had none to gain What goal was left for them to attain So Oderus did call for conclave
First came Balsac his council was wise His war axe gleamed he was a loyal knight Plus forty dancing bears he did provide Then, first in prowess he stood his lord beside
Beefcake the Mighty his ass was wide Brought Eighty laden oxen, he was a good ally Jizmak the Gusha, his legion was described For many hours he barked at the tribe
But then, timely, the catering arrived Booze, drugs, food, 400 mule loads high Flattus Maximus this he did supply And now the mighty brothers of Gwar did bind
They will to journey and slay without plan Bring siege and terror to the cities of man Open Oberammergau Like hell was a womb, it tore
And from the wound the creatures pour Troll, Goblin, Manticore Siege machine and armored whore there will be battle like never before
The surface world learned of the malice Black Pope, ususrper, he saw through the veil They plan their defense in the land of the wasted Africa, bitter fruit she tasted
Ensign of industry, let it be raised There the camp of the Black Pope was placed his legions beneath, through the valleys they raced Chariots they rode, their skulls were iron plated
Belching fire, freshly painted 8000 battalions of knights freshly sainted But before the fought the were vaccinated To protect them from the AIDS that had been created
To continue the reign of the Black Pope unabated The people at home got a version G-Rated Here Gwar invaded Began the violation
The war barges, forecastles swarming Disgorging the troops, formations forming The low drone, of the horning Sounding a call, then a warning
A nuclear salvo where Gwar was encroaching Within a second ten legions were toasting Balsac said "did iyou feel something"? The lord was not boasting
The enemy is vast, steel carpets the terrain Still they are forming armor detrains They send forth a captain, OJ, by the name Flattus struck him in the brain
Burst the helmet made two parts of the mind chopped trough his gorget, through chest, into spine And the good captians blood flowed like wine Flattus said "so ends a cowards time"
Balsac is angry, he'll have no more He hurls his axe with greater force To smite Regis with terrible force his sheild breaks, his hauberk unsews
The axe bursts through the chest and torso Bright blood spurts, the guts are loosed by the throw and with that axe the soul from body goes Said Jizmak "that was a heavy blow"
Beefcake the Mighty dotted with spew His sword falls skulls burst in two The eyes burst from sockets, he is not through Thousands of warriors he does this too
Piling up corpses of those he slew until it was hard to tell if the pile grew Balsac said "He is a princely lord" Said Beefcake "yes it is true"
Jizmak smites, his hammer whirls Foreheads explode, entrails whirl Breaking open brain-pans as well Red blood flowing as souls speed to hell
Oderus smites the Black Pope, exposing the brain The blade continued through meat and membrane Bright blood flowed in the grass where he was lain There ends this tale, that much is plain