Back when I was just eighteen, I met the man in black
He said, "Jon, it's nice to meet you, my name is Jack"
We hung out all the time, we became good friends
We ran around, we hit the town every damn weekend
I started missin' work 'cause I was dog-tired
That boss man had enough and good ol' Jack got me fired

Me and Jack don't get along no more
He's high up on the shelf while I'm lyin' on the floor
He makes me do things I've never done before
He makes me cuss, he makes me fight
Don't know what I did last night
Should've left his ass at the liquor store
No, me and Jack don't get along no more

Saw the girl of my dreams and man, she made me nervous
So, I leaned on my buddy Jack 'cause he gave me the courage
I swept her off her feet, stole her heart and made her mine
She moved in and didn't like my friend Jack takin' all our time
She started gettin' jealous, said, "Jack's got to go"
He just wouldn't leave, so my girl hit the road

And me and Jack don't get along no more
He's high up on the shelf while I'm lyin' on the floor
He makes me do things I've never done before
He makes me cuss, he makes me fight
Don't know what I did last night
Should've left his ass at the liquor store
No, me and Jack don't get along no more
Oh no

Well, Jack got me in a trouble and I wound up in jail
So, I'm here doin' time 'cause he won't pay my bail
I'm gonna change my ways as soon as I get out
I'm headed for that liquor store to buy a fifth of Crown, 'cause

Me and Jack don't get along no more
He's high up on the shelf while I'm lyin' on the floor
He makes me do things I've never done before
He makes me cuss, he makes me fight
Don't know what I did last night
Should've left his ass at the liquor store
No, me and Jack don't get along no more

No, me and Jack don't get along no more
No, we don't