And I remember flashes of laughter And lunatics lost in your soul Seductive propaganda scrolling across my mind Like guerrilla cinema
Belts and, and wooden spoons Flies in the afterbirth Shadows across my mind
Smiling but dead, smiling but dead Smiling but dead, smiling but dead Smiling but dead, smiling but dead
Crawling on linoleum kitchens TV streaming death And corporate consciousness into my brain Cracked porcelain sinks Covered with insects and dirty dishes
The early morning anxiety of, of grade school Dark stockings to hide the bruises The secret friends, festive holidays And everyone in their, in their Sunday best Pretending to like each other
Generations and generations Of loneliness, sad mistakes Stealing away in the dead of night To escape stiff jawed henchmen In, in the hungry trucks of an angry slumlord Miles and miles away
Patience and understanding Waking on the side of the road Hissing radiator, hoses cracked like, like burned skin And days so hot A nuclear holocaust would've felt like A cyclonian blizzard
I remember the first time I felt it alive inside me, turning But the dead weight moving Within the folds of its winged embrace
Opening and sliding those black feathers Inches at a time Its beak, its, its feet Pushing and pushing and, and pushing And digging into the membrane
And I remember going numb And listening to it hum I'm feeling it move in its mysteries Exploring me with power
I remember this And I know I never had a chance There was never any escaping it Amen