Weeeehhhllll...

The Poopsmith he could talk,
[Poopsmith]: Hell-o!
And Marzipan would rock,
And The Stick would be this big ol' tree
That'd try to eat everyone except The Cheat and me!
[Strong Mad]: And me!
We'll see!

And the King of Town would be underground
In a box filled up with peas
[KOT]: I hate peas!
I know!

Bubs would give away flamethrowers
That shoot chocolate hundred dollar bills
[Bubs]: Imitation chocolate!
My stupid baby brother
Would've been born with horns and a tail!
[Strong Sad]: I'm evil.

Coach Z would wear his school jacket
[Coach]: Check it out, yo!
And Homestar just couldn't hag it.
[Homestar]: I quit!
And Pom-Pom would change it all
So he'd look like an ABA basketball!

Two, three, four...
This little weirdo...
Would be a modestly hot girl
To help me through the hard times...
You know, the kind that are only sorta hot,
So they don't mess around with other guys...

[Homsar]: Nah-ah-ah-ah! I'm forever your girl!