Storming through the kitchen just to find a jar of mayo
While I'm packing lunch for a trip on my winnebago
As a kid, made it big, and they all knew me by name
My old punk rock band got me money and fame

Hanging out at the golf course on the weekend
Acting chummy, trading stocks with my best friends
I had to pick up my prescription at the drugstore
I remember it's the first time that I realized

I'm getting old, and life is a nightmare
I'm getting old, I just found my first gray hair
Nobody cares, cause all the kids in today's
Pop punk scene were born after

I won't say goodbye
I'm getting older all the time
And though I'm not as relevant
My old songs are pretty sweet

Please don't mind what I'm trying to say cause I
I like the nostalgia when I hear you
Tell me my band is here to stay
Even though we don't wanna change
Modern musicians really freakin' blow

I was once full of joy
What happened to fall out boy?
They're not the band that they once were
Now they're all superstars, forgot about their guitars
Those days have turned into one big blur

Give me a reason
To go see a doctor
To schedule a date for
A prostate exam

It might hurt to piss
Doesn't mean that I will go
You better keep your thumb away from me
Don't tell me I'm at that age and
Don't call me old, don't call me old
Don't call me old, don't call me old

I don't even relate to the youth
I don't wanna do the things they do
I'm never gonna get the memes they make
And I don't ever wanna, I don't ever
Wanna be a millennial idiot

They all like that boy band from australia
Why should I cater to their entitlement?
Those selfish little pampered millennials

Whoa, you should speak for yourself
You're not the only old-school warped band
Whoa, I'm pushing 30, doing well for myself
And I'm still pretty relevant

I got your drift, girl
Female singer, count me in
'Cause I realize now why all these artists don't end up has-beens
It might take some time, a little bit of
Planning with my record label, everything, everything
Will be just fine, collaborate, with taylor swift
We'll just sell out, sell out

Drop a song, on youtube
You should all sit back, watch closely as I go mainstream
We're selling out now, and we're changing our sound
Much bigger than the early 2000s
I'll chart as number one on billboard
I've lost some respect, but I'll just ignore it

If I could travel time things would get better
Relive the glory days and rock forever
Say it ain't so
It will not grow
I need a moment
In the bathroom
I know I still
Can be your thrill
The night will go on
The night will go on
My little blue pill