When I wake up
When I am not asleep
Sometime between the night and the day
The Creepy Weeper's calling
and reaching out his hands to me
the longest arm of all

Then he tells me
exactly what to do
for you
who need me most of all
and says if I should grow up
we'll lose the perfect love
he says
I'm made up out of them

I am a fake
I am a ripoff
I will definitely shit on you to get off

When my life is over
I'll think about the day
and joy that I created maybe just for you

Eventually,
he says the strongest walls will fall
and show the monkey (that's me)
Give them the gift of knowing
the truth behind the dream
they love much more than you and me

I am unreal
I am pretentious
I am definitely far beyond redemption

But when I finally wake up
there's nothing else to do
but write a silly song
and sing it just for you

YOU and ME!
ME and ME!

When you think about me
and what I seem to be
You'll see that life is mainly me

I am the world
I am the real one
I will definitely step on bugs (and kill them)

But in this voice I'm thinking
I know just what to do
I'll make a perfect turd and sell it
just for you

I am a sponge
I am a pissant
I am definitely enclosed by sycophants

But if my tongue's wisdom
fall underneath your ears
I'll try forgiveness in me
just for you

I am a worm
I am a goofball
I am definitely not there when the poop falls

But there is a feeling in me
that elevates my soul
when I wallow in self pity
just for you

I am a flake
I am a donut
I am definitely whinier with no nuts

But sometimes I look up
and feel the sun on me
and know it is a perfect world
(it has to be!)
yes, I know it is a perfect world
it has to be!